Friday, November 4, 2011

If the dog vomits under the bed...

and nobody sees him eat it...

65+ pounds of energy and love
Last night we were all piled into bed.  I was in Mommy Sleep (do I need to define this?) Jack was dead asleep.  It was the middle of the night and Tobi, our big, black, rescue Lab began to cough something up under the bed.  I am not sure if Jack was awake.  I think that he must have heard it -I mean it is hard not to hear a 65+ pound dog do anything, especially vomit under the bed.
Both of us immediately began the first round of the silent, unspoken game of chicken that we play during the darkest hours of the night.  When Baby Bee was still pooping in the middle of the night, it was Diaper Chicken.  When Tobi was still puppy enough to need to go out in the middle of the night it was Puppy Chicken.  Now, it has reverted to Dog Vomit Chicken.  The rules?  Basically, who can pretend to have slept through said offensive noise longest.  I have to say, my neurotic tendencies make me a weak player.  Jack can sleep through pretty much anything. Seriously, the guy regularly slept through mortar attacks when he was in Iraq.
Poor Tobi.
Pre-Baby I would have leaped out of bed and stuck my nose way too close to whatever had just been purged to determine what it was and if my dear furry baby was OK.  I would have cleaned it up in the dark and spent a couple of minutes petting his troubled tummy.  Then, getting back into bed I would have worried about the possible implications of what he had eaten.
Bring on Childbirth and Motherhood.
Last night Dog Vomit Chicken ended without a winner or a loser.  We both stayed in bed.  I was awake and listening.  When I heard telltale lapping sounds.  I rolled over and went back to sleep.  Thanks for taking one for the team, Tobes.
Poor Tobi.  I figured A: if he threw up again I would check it out and B: if it was still on the floor in the morning- please not on my slippers--I would see the offending piece of foreign substance he had ingested and we'd go from there.  Poor Tobi.

This morning there was nothing there.  And Tobi appears as chipper as ever.


  1. Haha, Dog vomit chicken :). Reminds me of somebody-smells-like-he-needs-to-get-changed chicken.

  2. Yep. Same! What about the counters need to be wiped down chicken or Pile up the surfaces Jenga- when the pile finally topples, he who last laid the offending piece must clean up?